Our Favorite Freaky Christmas Ornaments on Etsy

We’re a Halloween company so naturally, we have a tough time dealing with the cheerfulness of Christmas time. The urge to hide in the bathroom wearing a Jason mask with a rubber knife during our “normal” friends’ ugly Christmas sweater potlucks is too tempting for most of us. All hope is not lost, however, as this year we’ve seen more and more of Halloween fighting to invade Christmas.

While you’re not going to find a section of severed and diseased limbs to hang from the tree at Wal-Mart or Target, thankfully we have sites like Etsy where people are able to sell their demented wares to like-minded monsters.

We’ve put together a short collection of some of our favorite ornaments to fill your horrible Christmas tree this holiday season.

 

Dreadful Digs

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Dreadful Digs appears to be an Etsy seller that mostly sells bloodied clothing: lab-coats, scrubs, and even women’s underwear. To people like us who are almost always covered in real or fake blood anyway, we don’t see too much of a use for these items. However, Dreadful Digs does sell some really excellent, detailed skulls wearing Christmas hats.

 

GOREnaments

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GOREnaments, based out of Hollywood, are right up our alley. It’s almost like someone peered into our tiny little brains and saw exactly what we wanted – severed toes and little skeletons in coffins. Best of all, a few of them feature little bows so your Grandmother will not immediately be pissed at you when she opens your thoughtful gift. Just after she looks at it for a few seconds.

 

Blacknick Sculpture

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Have you ever wanted a hand-crafted, Cyclops Santa? Probably not, but that’s only because you didn’t know it existed. And for those of you awful people who have something against one eyed monsters, you’re lucky that Blacknick Sculpture offers cheery zombies and squidmen.

 

Dead Buddies

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I can’t tell if these are just painted tennis balls with a cut through the center, but whatever they are, we all love them. Unfortunately, Dead Buddies’ store is offline while the artist, Jennifer Burns, is on vacation. We say she’s earned it after creating these lovable little pals that remind us of the classic Madballs (the toys, not the New York hardcore band).
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Mealymonster
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Mostly working in the realm of creating amazing sculptures, artist Nicole Johnson branches out for the holidays to create some weird snake creatures and homemade ghosts. Also, as I’m sure anyone reading this is looking for Halloween stuff, don’t ignore the pumpkins on the second page of her store.

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The Wicked Woods

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If we had awards to hand out, we’d give one to The Wicked Woods for selling some of the oddest ornaments that we’re still totally into. I have no words to describe the feelings I get when looking at the nude fairy ornament.

Tom Taggart

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Thomas Taggart was the mayor of Indianapolis from 1985 to 1901. He was also the chairman of the Democratic National Committee from 1904 until 1908, helping Thomas

Riley Marshall all the way through his Vice Presidential nomination in 1912. But who cares, because Tom Taggart is the similar name of a person even more memorable for us: some bad-ass dude who sculpts amazing things on Etsy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Undead Ed

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Finally, we have the works of Undead Ed to promote. Undead Ed seems to be another fairly creative master – he’s currently selling Walking Dead Plastic Zombie plugs for your gauged ears.

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Duuuuuuude.

Anyway, luckily for the purposes of this article, he also makes some pretty outstanding Christmas ornaments. The ones that really caught our attention were his bears with gross looking eyes, evil gingerbread men, and an ornament with an evil spirit face that reminds us of the cover of a Morbid Angel record.

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